Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Every concussion has its silver lining
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
