His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
