Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
You made out with two different species that night
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
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