there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Randomize
