They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
