So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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