mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Randomize
