Buhtt sex?
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize