Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
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