Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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