I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
