the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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