i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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