we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
