saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
