why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Randomize
