I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
tell me about the fingering
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize