maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
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