idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
This baby is an asshole
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
