I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize