it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Randomize
