it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
i wish my penis had a tongue
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
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