he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Randomize