You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
