I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
