check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I miss vodka workout Fridays
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Randomize
