almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
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