omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
