..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
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