How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
