PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Randomize
