It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize