i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
