Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
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