Got a toothbrush?
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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