Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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