if i died would you start the facebook group?
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
