Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
