i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
