people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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