booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
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