hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
