guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
