We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Randomize
