that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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