I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
