Swine flu. Run for my life!
We named our party play list daddy issues
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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