so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
