tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
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