Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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