i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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